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天天笑话集
爆笑
变得很聪明
21811
变得很聪明有一天,爸爸和儿子一起洗澡。儿子说:『爸爸!为什麽你的那麽大,我的那麽小?』爸爸说:『因为我比较聪明,你比较笨嘛;但爸爸怕儿子自卑,又说:『没关系,以後你就会变聪明了;後来他们一家去参加天体营时,爸爸去上厕所回来,只见儿子不见妈妈,就问:『妈妈呢?』儿子说:『刚刚有一个人本来笨笨的,看到妈妈後,突然变得很聪明,妈妈就跟着他走了。』.......
上帝造人
天主教学校
4210
天主教学校小明的数学成绩非常差,可是自从他爸爸把他转到一所天主教学校後,他的成绩就变得很好。他爸爸觉得很奇怪,就问他是不是老师教的好?还是怎样?结果小明说:「我到学校的第一天时,发现有个人被钉在数学的加号上,我以为数学不好就要被钉在上面。所以…」
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SQL
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请求信息 : 2025-06-16 07:17:33 HTTP/1.1 GET : www.abkabk.com/xiaohua/list_baoxiao-1.html
运行时间 : 0.136626s [ 吞吐率:7.32req/s ] 内存消耗:741.58kb 文件加载:71
查询信息 : 7 queries 0 writes
缓存信息 : 108 reads,0 writes
配置加载 : 67
/var/www/html/xiaohua/public/index.php ( 0.93 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/start.php ( 0.73 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/base.php ( 2.66 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Loader.php ( 18.84 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/composer/autoload_namespaces.php ( 0.21 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/composer/autoload_psr4.php ( 1.74 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/composer/autoload_classmap.php ( 44.24 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/composer/autoload_files.php ( 0.62 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/symfony/polyfill-mbstring/bootstrap.php ( 3.96 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/topthink/think-captcha/src/helper.php ( 1.59 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Route.php ( 58.65 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Config.php ( 6.02 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Validate.php ( 38.46 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/topthink/think-migration/src/config.php ( 0.78 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Console.php ( 21.18 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/topthink/think-queue/src/config.php ( 0.77 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/topthink/think-testing/src/config.php ( 0.65 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Error.php ( 3.59 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/convention.php ( 9.69 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/App.php ( 20.45 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Request.php ( 47.89 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/config.php ( 10.03 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/database.php ( 1.87 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/extra/Mycfg.php ( 0.07 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Hook.php ( 3.85 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/tags.php ( 1.07 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/common.php ( 25.04 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Env.php ( 1.08 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/helper.php ( 16.78 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Debug.php ( 7.09 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/common/behavior/InitHookBehavior.php ( 1.43 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Cache.php ( 5.60 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Log.php ( 5.41 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/cache/driver/File.php ( 6.95 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/cache/Driver.php ( 5.45 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Db.php ( 6.51 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/db/connector/Sqlite.php ( 3.16 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/db/Connection.php ( 26.75 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/db/Query.php ( 73.83 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/db/builder/Sqlite.php ( 1.93 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/db/Builder.php ( 26.90 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Lang.php ( 6.98 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/lang/zh-cn.php ( 3.67 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/route.php ( 0.83 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/config.php ( 0.75 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/common.php ( 0.41 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/controller/Xiaohua.php ( 7.43 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/common/controller/FrontendCommon.php ( 2.69 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/common/controller/BaseCommon.php ( 0.48 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Controller.php ( 6.15 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/traits/controller/Jump.php ( 4.86 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/View.php ( 5.75 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/view/driver/Think.php ( 5.46 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Template.php ( 46.13 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/template/driver/File.php ( 2.24 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/backend/model/Config.php ( 4.48 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Model.php ( 44.64 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/model/Xiaohua.php ( 0.99 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/paginator/driver/Bootstrap.php ( 5.44 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Paginator.php ( 6.78 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/paginator/Collection.php ( 2.24 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Collection.php ( 8.62 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/model/XiaohuaTypes.php ( 1.00 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/model/XiaohuaTags.php ( 1.00 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/model/XiaohuaGood.php ( 0.99 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Cookie.php ( 6.39 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/runtime/temp/9763d510d413ed8ebd0131f4ad8895c3.php ( 13.63 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Url.php ( 12.55 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/controller/CommonData.php ( 1.90 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Response.php ( 8.37 KB )
/var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/debug/Html.php ( 4.27 KB )
[ CACHE ] INIT File
[ DB ] INIT sqlite
[ BEHAVIOR ] Run \app\common\behavior\InitHookBehavior @app_init [ RunTime:0.000981s ]
[ LANG ] /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/lang/zh-cn.php
[ ROUTE ] array ( 'type' => 'module', 'module' => array ( 0 => 'frontend', 1 => 'xiaohua', 2 => 'lists', ), )
[ HEADER ] array ( 'connection' => 'keep-alive', 'cache-control' => 'max-age=259200', 'x-forwarded-for' => '10.3.45.6', 'via' => '1.1 squid-proxy-5b5d847c96-wgpbm (squid/6.10)', 'host' => 'www.abkabk.com', 'accept-encoding' => 'gzip, br, zstd, deflate', 'cookie' => 'return_url=%2Fshipu%2Flists.html%3Fpage%3D1%26typeurlname%3Ddaiyu', 'user-agent' => 'Mozilla/5.0 AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko; compatible; ClaudeBot/1.0; +claudebot@anthropic.com)', 'accept' => '*/*', 'content-length' => '', 'content-type' => '', )
[ PARAM ] array ( 'page' => '1', 'typeurlname' => 'baoxiao', )
[ RUN ] app\frontend\controller\Xiaohua->lists[ /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/controller/Xiaohua.php ]
[ DB ] INIT sqlite
[ VIEW ] /var/www/html/xiaohua/themes/pc_default/xiaohua/lists.html [ array ( 0 => 'seo_title', 1 => 'web_site_title', 2 => 'seo_keywords', 3 => 'seo_description', 4 => 'web_site_url', 5 => 'seo_url', 6 => 'list', 7 => 'page', 8 => 'type_list', 9 => 'right_one_title', 10 => 'right_one_item', 11 => 'right_two_title', 12 => 'right_two_item', 13 => 'right_thired_title', 14 => 'right_thired_item', 15 => 'right_fourth_title', 16 => 'right_fourth_item', ) ]
[ RUN ] app\frontend\controller\CommonData->navList[ /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/controller/CommonData.php ]
[ DB ] INIT sqlite
[ RUN ] app\frontend\controller\CommonData->linkList[ /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/controller/CommonData.php ]
[ DB ] INIT sqlite
[ DB ] CONNECT:[ UseTime:0.000112s ] sqlite:../application/db/#cms.x.php
[ SQL ] PRAGMA table_info( cms_sys_plugins ) [ RunTime:0.000501s ]
[ SQL ] SELECT name,hooks FROM cms_sys_plugins WHERE ( status=1 ) [ RunTime:0.000041s ]
[ DB ] CONNECT:[ UseTime:0.000069s ] sqlite:../application/db/#cms.x.php
[ SQL ] PRAGMA table_info( cms_xiaohua_content ) [ RunTime:0.000450s ]
[ SQL ] SELECT COUNT(*) AS tp_count FROM cms_xiaohua_content WHERE typeurlname = 'baoxiao' LIMIT 1 [ RunTime:0.030436s ]
[ SQL ] SELECT * FROM cms_xiaohua_content WHERE typeurlname = 'baoxiao' ORDER BY hits DESC LIMIT 12 OFFSET 0 [ RunTime:0.052098s ]
[ SQL ] SELECT * FROM cms_xiaohua_content ORDER BY hits DESC LIMIT 20 [ RunTime:0.033601s ]
[ SQL ] PRAGMA table_info( cms_xiaohua_good ) [ RunTime:0.000077s ]
[ SQL ] SELECT * FROM cms_xiaohua_good ORDER BY hits DESC LIMIT 10 [ RunTime:0.002194s ]
[ DB ] CONNECT:[ UseTime:0.000096s ] sqlite:../application/db/#cms.x.php
[ SQL ] PRAGMA table_info( cms_channel ) [ RunTime:0.000429s ]
[ SQL ] SELECT * FROM cms_channel WHERE status = 1 ORDER BY sort DESC,id DESC [ RunTime:0.000052s ]
[ DB ] CONNECT:[ UseTime:0.000058s ] sqlite:../application/db/#cms.x.php
[ SQL ] PRAGMA table_info( cms_friendlink ) [ RunTime:0.000438s ]
[ SQL ] SELECT * FROM cms_friendlink WHERE is_check = 1 AND status = 1 ORDER BY sort DESC,id DESC [ RunTime:0.000069s ]
0.136941s