精神病医院笑话
6649
科学附身
5843
科学附身在十八世纪,有位博学多才的俄罗斯学者。有一次,他和宫廷贵族某伯爵为一个问题争论起来。“你简直是个大傻瓜!”伯爵气急败坏地嚷道。“阁下,有人说,在俄国大臣下面当一个傻瓜是最荣幸的。即使这样,我也不愿意。”学者平静地说。“我要把你开除出科学院!”伯爵大人叫得更凶了。学者神色坦然地望着他,说:“请原谅,阁下,不管您怎么说,也无法把科学从我身上开除出去!”.......
以翅代腿
世上本不该有女人
2554
世上本不该有女人作者:雪明末清初文学家李笠翁说:人生如戏,历史如戏。戏台上只有两个人在唱戏--一个男人,一个女人。演戏之初,上帝造人之时,先造的是男人。上帝为什么后来又造了女人,我不免要以"小人之心度君子之腹"了,准是上帝见他造的男人日子过得悠闲,毫无烦恼,胜似神仙,于是生了妒嫉之心,便又造了个女人。有了女人,男人便开始变傻,变痴,变烦躁,变寂寞,变得无所适从……总之,男人开始有了麻烦。而女人.......
世上本不该有女人
李白之妻女
2357
李白之妻女昨天,有位姐姐问我:“你知道李白的老婆和女儿叫什么名字吗?”我一时傻眼了,亏我平常还说对唐诗宋词颇有研究,居然连李白这样的超级诗人的老婆和女儿都不知道,而且我甚至不知道李白有没有老婆和女儿,真是惭愧啊!姐姐见我一脸困惑难堪,言道:“李白的老婆叫赵香芦,女儿叫李紫烟!”我正想问从哪里看到的。姐姐说:“有诗为证。”“哪首诗?”“日照香炉生紫烟。”乍听,仍显愕然。细品,大笑不已。李白之妻女
留半小时
2167
留半小时黄球迷:请问你们球队为何规定晚上11点钟关门,而不是10点半呢?傻教练:因为我们球队门口那家歌舞厅要10点半才关门,我当然要留半个小时的走路时间给队员.......
留半小时
蜂蜜
2135
蜂蜜有一个人从小有个坏习惯,撒尿的时候要对着一个洞才能撒得出来,一天,他对着一个洞树撒尿,谁知道洞里飞出一群蜜蜂,把他的小弟弟针得红肿,痛的呱呱叫,以后他再也不敢对着洞撒尿了.到了他结洞房的时候,他老婆把衣服都脱了,但他动也不动."老公,来嘛,春宵一刻呀""不,我怕.""怕?怕什么.""怕你那里有蜜蜂""傻瓜,我这里没有蜜蜂,不信你用手来摸摸".他摸了后跳了起来指着他老婆大声骂道"你他妈骗我,.......
蜂蜜
爱
2124
爱女:“我爱你。”男:“你上次不是说不爱我吗?”女:”咳!你真傻。我们女孩子嘴上说不爱,其实心里很爱。”男:“哦!那么你现在是不爱我了。”.......
爱
傻瓜
2082
傻瓜一个富翁买了桶酒,在桶盖上巾了封条.他的仆人在桶底上钻了个洞,每天偷酒喝.富翁发现封条完整无缺,可是酒一天天减少,惊奇不已.有人建议他检查一下桶底,看看是否有破绽,富翁答道:你真是个傻瓜,是上面的酒少了,下面的酒一点儿也没少....
基本
文件
流程
错误
SQL
调试
- 请求信息 : 2025-06-16 16:06:40 HTTP/1.1 GET : www.abkabk.com/xiaohua/list_yuren-1.html
- 运行时间 : 0.112460s [ 吞吐率:8.89req/s ] 内存消耗:759.73kb 文件加载:71
- 查询信息 : 7 queries 0 writes
- 缓存信息 : 108 reads,0 writes
- 配置加载 : 67
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/public/index.php ( 0.93 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/start.php ( 0.73 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/base.php ( 2.66 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Loader.php ( 18.84 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/composer/autoload_namespaces.php ( 0.21 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/composer/autoload_psr4.php ( 1.74 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/composer/autoload_classmap.php ( 44.24 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/composer/autoload_files.php ( 0.62 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/symfony/polyfill-mbstring/bootstrap.php ( 3.96 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/topthink/think-captcha/src/helper.php ( 1.59 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Route.php ( 58.65 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Config.php ( 6.02 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Validate.php ( 38.46 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/topthink/think-migration/src/config.php ( 0.78 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Console.php ( 21.18 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/topthink/think-queue/src/config.php ( 0.77 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/vendor/topthink/think-testing/src/config.php ( 0.65 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Error.php ( 3.59 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/convention.php ( 9.69 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/App.php ( 20.45 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Request.php ( 47.89 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/config.php ( 10.03 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/database.php ( 1.87 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/extra/Mycfg.php ( 0.07 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Hook.php ( 3.85 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/tags.php ( 1.07 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/common.php ( 25.04 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Env.php ( 1.08 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/helper.php ( 16.78 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Debug.php ( 7.09 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/common/behavior/InitHookBehavior.php ( 1.43 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Cache.php ( 5.60 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Log.php ( 5.41 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/cache/driver/File.php ( 6.95 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/cache/Driver.php ( 5.45 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Db.php ( 6.51 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/db/connector/Sqlite.php ( 3.16 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/db/Connection.php ( 26.75 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/db/Query.php ( 73.83 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/db/builder/Sqlite.php ( 1.93 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/db/Builder.php ( 26.90 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Lang.php ( 6.98 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/lang/zh-cn.php ( 3.67 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/route.php ( 0.83 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/config.php ( 0.75 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/common.php ( 0.41 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/controller/Xiaohua.php ( 7.43 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/common/controller/FrontendCommon.php ( 2.69 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/common/controller/BaseCommon.php ( 0.48 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Controller.php ( 6.15 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/traits/controller/Jump.php ( 4.86 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/View.php ( 5.75 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/view/driver/Think.php ( 5.46 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Template.php ( 46.13 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/template/driver/File.php ( 2.24 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/backend/model/Config.php ( 4.48 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Model.php ( 44.64 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/model/Xiaohua.php ( 0.99 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/paginator/driver/Bootstrap.php ( 5.44 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Paginator.php ( 6.78 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/paginator/Collection.php ( 2.24 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Collection.php ( 8.62 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/model/XiaohuaTypes.php ( 1.00 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/model/XiaohuaTags.php ( 1.00 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/model/XiaohuaGood.php ( 0.99 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Cookie.php ( 6.39 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/runtime/temp/9763d510d413ed8ebd0131f4ad8895c3.php ( 13.63 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Url.php ( 12.55 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/controller/CommonData.php ( 1.90 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/Response.php ( 8.37 KB )
- /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/library/think/debug/Html.php ( 4.27 KB )
- [ CACHE ] INIT File
- [ DB ] INIT sqlite
- [ BEHAVIOR ] Run \app\common\behavior\InitHookBehavior @app_init [ RunTime:0.000837s ]
- [ LANG ] /var/www/html/xiaohua/thinkphp/lang/zh-cn.php
- [ ROUTE ] array (
'type' => 'module',
'module' =>
array (
0 => 'frontend',
1 => 'xiaohua',
2 => 'lists',
),
)
- [ HEADER ] array (
'connection' => 'keep-alive',
'cache-control' => 'max-age=259200',
'x-forwarded-for' => '10.3.45.6',
'via' => '1.1 squid-proxy-5b5d847c96-wgpbm (squid/6.10)',
'host' => 'www.abkabk.com',
'accept-encoding' => 'gzip, br, zstd, deflate',
'user-agent' => 'Mozilla/5.0 AppleWebKit/537.36 (KHTML, like Gecko; compatible; ClaudeBot/1.0; +claudebot@anthropic.com)',
'accept' => '*/*',
'content-length' => '',
'content-type' => '',
)
- [ PARAM ] array (
'page' => '1',
'typeurlname' => 'yuren',
)
- [ RUN ] app\frontend\controller\Xiaohua->lists[ /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/controller/Xiaohua.php ]
- [ DB ] INIT sqlite
- [ VIEW ] /var/www/html/xiaohua/themes/pc_default/xiaohua/lists.html [ array (
0 => 'seo_title',
1 => 'web_site_title',
2 => 'seo_keywords',
3 => 'seo_description',
4 => 'web_site_url',
5 => 'seo_url',
6 => 'list',
7 => 'page',
8 => 'type_list',
9 => 'right_one_title',
10 => 'right_one_item',
11 => 'right_two_title',
12 => 'right_two_item',
13 => 'right_thired_title',
14 => 'right_thired_item',
15 => 'right_fourth_title',
16 => 'right_fourth_item',
) ]
- [ RUN ] app\frontend\controller\CommonData->navList[ /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/controller/CommonData.php ]
- [ DB ] INIT sqlite
- [ RUN ] app\frontend\controller\CommonData->linkList[ /var/www/html/xiaohua/application/frontend/controller/CommonData.php ]
- [ DB ] INIT sqlite
- [ DB ] CONNECT:[ UseTime:0.000098s ] sqlite:../application/db/#cms.x.php
- [ SQL ] PRAGMA table_info( cms_sys_plugins ) [ RunTime:0.000432s ]
- [ SQL ] SELECT name,hooks FROM cms_sys_plugins WHERE ( status=1 ) [ RunTime:0.000033s ]
- [ DB ] CONNECT:[ UseTime:0.000069s ] sqlite:../application/db/#cms.x.php
- [ SQL ] PRAGMA table_info( cms_xiaohua_content ) [ RunTime:0.000410s ]
- [ SQL ] SELECT COUNT(*) AS tp_count FROM cms_xiaohua_content WHERE typeurlname = 'yuren' LIMIT 1 [ RunTime:0.028862s ]
- [ SQL ] SELECT * FROM cms_xiaohua_content WHERE typeurlname = 'yuren' ORDER BY hits DESC LIMIT 12 OFFSET 0 [ RunTime:0.028332s ]
- [ SQL ] SELECT * FROM cms_xiaohua_content ORDER BY hits DESC LIMIT 20 [ RunTime:0.032998s ]
- [ SQL ] PRAGMA table_info( cms_xiaohua_good ) [ RunTime:0.000452s ]
- [ SQL ] SELECT * FROM cms_xiaohua_good ORDER BY hits DESC LIMIT 10 [ RunTime:0.002490s ]
- [ DB ] CONNECT:[ UseTime:0.000080s ] sqlite:../application/db/#cms.x.php
- [ SQL ] PRAGMA table_info( cms_channel ) [ RunTime:0.000455s ]
- [ SQL ] SELECT * FROM cms_channel WHERE status = 1 ORDER BY sort DESC,id DESC [ RunTime:0.000072s ]
- [ DB ] CONNECT:[ UseTime:0.000070s ] sqlite:../application/db/#cms.x.php
- [ SQL ] PRAGMA table_info( cms_friendlink ) [ RunTime:0.000383s ]
- [ SQL ] SELECT * FROM cms_friendlink WHERE is_check = 1 AND status = 1 ORDER BY sort DESC,id DESC [ RunTime:0.000084s ]

0.112793s